Wouldn't it be easier if there was no dating? No sitting by the phone, no wondering how people feel about you, no awkward moments where you have nothing to say? Albert: Welcome to NoDating, how may I help you? Marcus: I've heard good things about your InstantRelationship program, I think I'd like to try it. Albert: Alright, follow me. Marcus follows Albert in the back of the store, they walk down a long hallway where all the doors are closed. Finally, Albert unlocks one door and ushers Marcus to step inside. The room is a bit cramp, there's a bed and a chair inside. In the back there's also a sink with an empty glass on it. Albert: Lie down here please. Marcus lies down on the bed. Albert pulls out a box of what looks like tic tacs from his pocket. He goes over to the sink, fills the glass with water and comes back to the bed. Albert: Here, take one of these and swallow. Marcus takes a pill and drinks the water. -- end scene -- * two hours later * Marcus is lying on the bed sleeping. He opens his eyes and sits up. Albert is seated on the chair. Albert: How do you feel? Marcus: Fine, I slept well. Albert: Okay then, let's begin. First I'll give you a briefing, then you can ask any questions you may have. Your girlfriend's name is Melissa, she's 22 and teaches English evenings to adults in an after-school program. She's from Murcia, but she's lived here with her parents most of her life. Her parents are both lawyers. Melissa wants to be a marine biologist and she goes to school for that. * 40 minutes later * You see her on Tuesdays, Fridays and weekends. You also play tennis together Wednesdays at 5pm. Melissa loves reading, cooking, traveling and antiques. She's allergic to pepper. Marcus: Does she love me? Albert: Yes. What she loves most about you is your passion for poetry. Marcus: Say what now? Albert: You made that up on the first date to impress her. Marcus: Oh for crying out loud. Albert: Look, you know how this works. Any other questions? Marcus: I guess not. Albert. Well then, good luck! -- end scene -- * that evening * Melissa is cooking in the kitchen, Marcus is watching football on tv. He gets up from the couch to get a beer from the fridge. Melissa: I can't wait to go to that poetry recital tonight. Marcus: Uhm, Melissa, there's something I have to tell you.. I don't really like poetry. * 10 minutes later * Melissa: What else have you said that isn't true? Marcus: Well, I can't really say, but things may come up as we go along. -- end scene -- * one week later * Albert: Hi, welcome back. Marcus: *groan*
no dating

:: random entries in this category ::
Marine biologist? :D
Ha! I thought you were trying to convince us of the advantages of InstantRelationships. Very funny though.
[2] You don't think it's an advantage to go to NoDating in the morning and have a girlfriend by the evening? Hell, I'd go for it. :D Of course, it would be silly to assume that the normal problems and baggage would magically disappear.
funny, I really liked it :D
Very good schtuff! Thanks!